OUT AND ABOUT WITH SIR IAN
Why the world's foremost Shakespearean actor, Sir Ian
McKellen, who is touring the U.S. as Richard III, considers gay-rights
activism to be his finest role.
BY BEN BRANTLEY
Vanity Fair, June 1992
It was the sort of languid afternoon one gets in London in the early
spring, and the browsers who had wandered into the large, sun-emblazoned
Nash Room of the Institute of Contemporary Arts exuded a contented
aimlessness. Students on holiday casually cruised the eclectic assembly of
artworks, from decorative abstracts to extremely topical cartoons.
("Everyone knew I was gay," read the caption on one. "I had to write to the
newspaper to say that I was also an actor.") Two young men in standard-issue
single earrings and denim nuzzled each other lazily on the balcony
overlooking a verdant St. James's Park.
But when the portly man in banker's pinstripes, who seemed surprised
to find himself there, started to make a fast exit, he was summarily stopped
by a courteous but fierce supplication. "You will at least buy a T-shirt,
won't you?" The speaker—a lanky, rumpled professorial type who had been
fastidiously rearranging the exhibition brochures on the information
desk—had an intensely purposeful gleam that promised to overcome any
refusal. Moreover, the businessman had recognized the face behind the
rectangular spectacles and blushed. "Well, seeing as it's Sir Ian who's
telling me to, I suppose I must, mustn't I?" he stammered. He handed over
the five quid.
All afternoon, in fact, Sir Ian McKellen — England's pre-eminent
interpreter of Shakespeare and the first actor of his generation to receive
a knighthood — sustained a brisk, hucksterish energy, reminding everyone who
passed him, like a tightly coiled conscience, of the reason for the
exhibition: to raise funds for the Iris Trust and the Stonewall Group, the
lesbian-and-gay lobbyist organization he co-founded in 1988. And if no one
was going to plunk down the £100,000 asked for David Hockney's "Red Flowers
and Blue Spots," each of them could at least manage a fraction of that sum
for a T-shirt or a poster with its image (a pound extra if McKellen
autographed it for you).

Two nights before, a black-tie-clad McKellen had, amid a roaring
ovation, accepted his fifth Laurence Olivier Award for actor of the year,
for his performance in the National Theatre production of
Richard III, getting in, as
usual, a dig at government apathy to subsidized theater. (Not that those
awards mean anything, he told me brusquely when I congratulated him on it.) Now, in baggy pants and Beatle boots, he was pushing T-shirts, posters, and
gay rights.
The next day, assessing milestones in his personal and professional
lives, he singles out his decision four years ago, at the age of
forty-eight, to publicly declare his homosexuality:
"Coming out, coming out, coming out. That's the only thing I've ever
done, really. That's what it can say on the gravestone. That will be the
obituary."
The fact that he had spent much of his life as a publicly closeted gay
man—though always very comfortably "out" in the theater community and never
given to telling interviewers he was simply "waiting for the right girl"— is
something for which he continues to flagellate himself. It was, he
whispers dramatically, simply "lying."
When Ian McKellen comes to the States this month as producer and star
of a sixteen-week tour of Richard III — which
has been staged by National director Richard Eyre as a dark allegory of
twentieth-century fascism, and has previously toured Europe and Japan — he
will be presenting not only a stinging portrait of an ice-blooded tyrant but
a public persona that America is largely unfamiliar with: a mainstream star
who is openly, insistently homosexual. What's more — unlike the outspoken
Vanessa Redgrave — he seems to belong to, and be embraced by, the middle-class
establishment.
Since coming out, in response to the introduction of Clause 28 in
Parliament — a piece of legislation with strong anti-homosexual elements — he
has, as the most visible representative of Stonewall, arduously worked the
conventional corridors of power: keeping in touch with a network of
sympathetic "moles" in Parliament; writing crisply worded pieces on
homophobia for the dailies; appearing on network television as a morally
indignant visitor to the Isle of Man while homosexuality was still illegal
there; and, most dramatically, meeting with Prime Minister John Major at 10
Downing Street as a spokesman for lesbian and gay rights.
Asked about his personal identification with Richard III — the
embittered, ambitious "crookback" who became a king — he answers tellingly,
and with his customary academic caution: "You mean, do I think of myself as
a misfit? I mean, you know, I think it would be up to somebody else to write
this. But I could make a case for saying a gay man who has a mainstream
career and is recognized by the Establishment as being one of them is akin
to a man with an abject deformity, an abnormality, who is determined to rise
to the top of the heap. But — here, his rough-featured face creases into a
mask of exaggerated skepticism — "a misfit? I don't know. I've not felt a
misfit in quite a long time."
Correspondingly, McKellen's public role, as he sees it, is the gay
"communicator with the straight population," embodying "the point of view of
a gay man who has functioned in a straight society successfully in the last
thirty years." This implicitly non-threatening presence — and McKellen's
willingness to deal with the conservative powers that be — has antagonized
more radical elements of the English gay community. When he accepted the
knighthood during Margaret Thatcher's administration a year and a half ago,
Derek Jarman, the polemical filmmaker who has been a gay activist since the
sixties, wrote an incendiary letter to The Guardian, accusing
McKellen of having been co-opted by a government inimical to the queer
cause.
While a dramatic, famous-name-studded letter of support from eighteen
British lesbian and gay artists was printed soon after, Jarman remains
adamant in his objections. "Yes, Ian has done a great deal of good, but he's
also done a great deal of bad," Jarman says today. "Accepting a personal
knighthood from Mrs. Thatcher, who's done more to put back the clock of gay
rights than anyone in my lifetime . . . was an extraordinary misreading of
the role of the activist." Jarman also resents what he sees as the
"exclusivity" of Stonewall — a twenty-member organization which does not hold
open meetings — and says of McKellen's interview with Major, "Actually, the
great and radical thing, if you're going to call yourself Stonewall [named
for the 1969 riot in Greenwich Village, initiated by trans-vestites], would
have been to have gone to see the prime minister in a dress."
McKellen wore a suit and tie, of course. He defines himself, after
all, as "a conventional sort of person," and says his life-style has been,
in many ways, "straight, heterosexual: the two men I had longish
[eight-year] relationships with were, in a sense, marriages . . . based on
two people living together in the conventional straight way." But he will
also tell you, with a hissing vehemence, "I hate to be manipulated by
authority. I hate authority. I'm part of the Establishment and all that so I
can help dismantle it."

The seeming contradictions inherent in this earnest insider-outsider
stance are part of the larger paradox that has always been Ian McKellen, a
man who, his colleagues will tell you, seems to belong to the theater more
completely than anyone they've ever met, yet who periodically draws back to
ponder the legitimacy of his profession. "He has to know what the motivating
force of life is on an everyday basis," says Sean Mathias, his ex-lover and
the director of his recent, triumphant portrayal of the title role of Chekov's Uncle Vanya at the
National. He is also a bravura performer with a star's instinctive
narcissism and desire to dominate who nonetheless has twice set up
"democratic" actors' companies in which he would play small as well as
leading roles; a born politician seemingly made for leadership (it has for
years been rumored that he will eventually head the National Theatre, the
pre-eminent State-subsidized institution, which Olivier established in 1963)
who is ultimately reluctant to take the reins.
Sitting, appropriately, in the office of Richard Eyre, the National's
current head, where we have our first formal interview, McKellen says, "I
think if I'd pitched for it, I would have run Richard rather close. . . .
But it never crossed my mind to run this building. I don't mind coming here
and sitting in his chair while he's not here. But never, never, never. I'm
the head boy, not the headmaster. That's how you have to see me. I'm not an
initiator. I'm the man who carries the standard. I'm not the general."

Peter Hall, who ran the National during McKellen's first stint there,
in the mid-eighties, and who directed the actor's stunning Broadway debut in
Amadeus, for which he won a
Tony in 1981, believes McKellen "loves to hide behind the will of a group,
when in fact it is his will. . . . I don't think he enjoys the inevitable
unpopularity that comes with leadership. . . . Like all of us, he wants to
be loved.''
McKellen himself, speaking of his "personal connection" with many of
Shakespeare's protagonists, offers, "They are people who, however central
they might be to the life of the nation they are leading or wanting to lead,
feel somehow inside that they are inadequate to the task.''
In fact, McKellen's strength, both onstage and off, has been as an
interpreter rather than an initiator —someone who follows an established
precedent with a boldly individualistic style that transforms, and exalts,
the familiar. "There's nobody better at carrying the torch once it's been
lit," says Richard Eyre. Just as McKellen has brought new life to an
endlessly rendered gallery of Shakespearean heroes, he came out as a
homosexual in the wake of earlier declarations by such established British
actors as Simon Callow and Michael Cashman, but with a monumental dignity
that instantly made him the cause's leading figure. ("My coming out was
absolutely, directly linked to his," says Antony Sher, his Vanya co-star.) And McKellen admits he needed the external dynamic the movement provided: "I
suspect if I hadn't eventually come out because I was gay, then I might have
pretended that I was. I was a person looking for a cause."

Accordingly, he seems most comfortable following a script of sorts,
bringing his peerless energies and keen, Cambridge-trained powers of textual
analysis to pre-existing forms. He is, as Peter Hall notes, "a very complex
man who acts a part in public.'' Offstage — or outside the context of his role
as a theatrical spokesman — he is touchingly ungainly. Addressing the subject
of McKellen the man, he is given to stammers and long, reflective pauses;
his face sheds its charismatic cohesiveness, becoming weary and befuddled;
his furry North Country voice booms and fades like a randomly programmed
organ; the immense hands seem suddenly like cumbersome props, and he often
covers his face with them between sentences. As his friend the actress and
director Sheila Hancock notes, "Onstage he can convert himself into
anything. In Coriolanus,
he was like a steel rod. And yet offstage he flops about sort of like an
overgrown puppy."
McKellen himself says he is not "an adventurer, not an explorer. And
there's been one place in the world that I've taught myself to be not just
at home but to be in total control of myself. And that is in the theater. It
isn't just that you rehearse a play so that nothing can go wrong, but also
having the confidence that I would risk making a fool of myself, cutting
myself open and then going out on the stage and showing everybody. . . . But
for years that was the only area of my life when I was like that, and that
was therefore the only area of my life in which I was fulfilled. . . . That
must be connected, mustn't it, with someone whose sexuality is finally
undeclared? So if I'd been out — as so many kids are these days, bless their
hearts — at eighteen or nineteen, maybe I wouldn't have needed the theater as
much as I have done."

As to how, or if, coming out has affected his acting, McKellen is
guarded, noting simply that he is a more "self-aware person than I used to
be. . . . But that might have happened anyway." Friends and colleagues,
however, detect a definite sea change in McKellen the actor, effected, they
believe, by the incongruous dual events of his coming out and his receiving
the knighthood. Though always known as atypically generous and instructive
with the actors he works with, offstage, his friend Peter Eyre (no relation
to Richard), the actor and director, notes, "Ian's been quite competitive
about other actors who are much, much less good than him but who might be on
his territory. . . . And I think, funnily enough, that getting a knighthood
is going to do him a lot of good psychologically. Because he doesn't need to
be competitive anymore."
Richard Eyre thinks that since coming out McKellen has seemed to
locate in his performances "a greater range and a more palpable humanity." For years, the principal reservation about his acting has been that the
pyrotechnic virtuosity has sometimes masked a central vacuity — a tendency to
"indicate," in actors' parlance, rather than be. Eyre believes that McKellen
would have been incapable four years ago of the poignant, "naturalistic"
portrayals of life-beaten losers he gave in the National productions of
Napoli Milionaria and
Vanya. "Ian has never been less than a
thoroughly dazzling, effective actor," he continues. "But being humane and
accessible and moving you is different from being dazzling and effective." McKellen admits that in rehearsals for Vanya, "the instruction was
always 'Will you stop acting, please, and feel.' And so, in not overtly
characterizing, Uncle Vanya seemed to be coming from inside me."

Peter Hall describes McKellen as belonging to "the Olivier tradition — a
performer of genius who will do anything. He has great daring. You can also
see, as you could with Olivier, the wheels going round. . . . It is only in
the last few years that Ian has started to reveal bits of himself that were
private and personal. I can best describe it by saying that to me Ralph
Richardson was an actor of genius — someone who seemed to be switched into the
most complex of human emotions —whereas Olivier was a performer of genius.
Ian has been like Olivier, but I think he is moving into the great-actor
class as he shows more and more of himself. . . . I believe that now that
his public and private honesty is one we may be going to see his greatest
years."
Accordingly, though well into middle age, McKellen still speaks with
the self-searching rigor of a particularly puritanical adolescent. As Toby
Robertson, the former director of the Prospect Theatre Company, where
McKellen became a star, puts it, "There's the funny feeling that Ian — at
fifty-three — is still in many ways very much a young man. You don't feel
here's someone of great maturity: the man is yet to come."

The knottily linked identities of performer and reformer were forged
early in McKellen. He grew up in smalltown northern England, the son of a
borough engineer, and the grandson, on both sides of the family, of
Nonconformist ministers. His parents, he says, lived their lives, with quiet
obduracy, "on a level of principle." (His father was, daringly, a pacifist
and conscientious objector during World War II.) Though now an atheist,
McKellen says he was deeply influenced by "the Nonconformist conscience."
He was also mesmerized by the music-hall entertainers who would
perform locally, as well as by the metamorphic genius of performers he saw
at Stratford, such as Peggy Ashcroft. By twelve he was acting regularly in
productions at the Bolton School, where, true to form, he became head boy. Though he had identified his attraction to men well before adolescence, "at
a time when other children were experimenting sexually, I was learning about
the technicalities of acting. . . . It might have been a lot healthier for
me if I'd been, you know, having sex" — something which would not occur until
he was at university.
Of his mother, who died of breast cancer when McKellen was twelve
("God knows what that did to me"), he says, "My feelings about her were of
absolute adoration. She was the emotional center of my life, which was never
replaced by my father. He died [in a car accident] when I was twenty-four,
just at the point at which I ought to have been getting to know him.''
McKellen went on to Cambridge, where his fellow students included such
future luminaries as Derek Jacobi and Corin Redgrave — and played
twenty-one parts in his nine terms there. Already he was attracting national critical attention, and he slid into
professional status with uncommon facility. But it was working with the
fabled director Tyrone Guthrie, in
Nottingham, that he learned to "dare to do something which would fill a
theater." Those who remember watching McKellen throughout the sixties
describe him as a breed apart from the dominant school of minimal, realistic
performers then in vogue. "He had at that time a kind of bravura thing as an
actor which was very different from anybody else," says Peter Eyre.
When he appeared, in the late sixties, with the Prospect company, in
performances of a defiantly large-scaled emotional intensity as
Shakespeare's melancholy Richard II and
Marlowe's flamboyantly gay Edward II,
he was heralded as a new, fearless theatrical titan. "The ineffable presence
of God Himself enters into Mr. McKellen's Richard," wrote Harold Hobson, the
legendary dean of English critics. When the production moved to London,
Frank Sinatra was calling to see if someone could possibly get him tickets;
Noel Coward and Rudolf Nureyev were showing up in the star's dressing room;
John Gielgud sent a congratulatory telegram. And the cries began that here,
at last, was a worthy successor to Laurence Olivier.

McKellen himself is studiedly modest about his successes. As Peter
Hall observes, "He has an instinctive understanding of how unattractive the
necessary ego of a performer must be." McKellen sloughs off the New Olivier
moniker, admitting that he has measured his classical career against that of
Sir Laurence but saying that he couldn't possibly be what Olivier was. "He
was a Hollywood star, he was a film director, he was a theater impresario,
and he was married to the most beautiful woman who ever existed. What have I
done? Yes, I played a few of his old parts."
Still, like Olivier, McKellen established his own companies, albeit
according to his own Utopian lights. In 1972, with fellow actor Edward Petherbridge, he created the idealistic
Actors' Company, a democratic venture run by actors, in which the star
roles would be equally shared. McKellen admits that he left it, in part,
because he got tired of playing the small roles. A joke from the time:
"Did you hear? Ian McKellen's playing the third waiter in the new Actors'
Company play." "Really? What's it called?" "The Third Waiter." He and Petherbridge would repeat the attempt — within the institutional structure of
the National — in the mid-eighties, an experience he admits drove him to total
exhaustion.

From the beginning, he seemed uncannily sure of the direction of his
career, always shaped, he insists, with the goal of perfecting his craft. It
still seems to rankle him a bit that he never made a great success in films
("Do I envy Albert Finney, or Alan Bates, their careers? Do they envy me? We're just different"), and he allows that he wouldn't mind the film actor's
salary. (Working six-performance weeks at the National earns him the
equivalent of roughly $1,300.) But the theater, McKellen's friends will tell
you, is unconditionally his natural element.
This was evident the afternoon I watched McKellen during technical
rehearsals for Richard III as he blithely ran the portrayal through
an astonishing number of performance levels — from underplayed austerity to
Quasimodo-like gargoylishness —periodically breaking off to become McKellen
the producer ("Can I just say I think the boots of the soldiers should be
much shinier than they are?"). Sheila Hancock notes his "ability to be
giving an extraordinary performance and whispering awful things under his
breath. . . . It's just like a child playing a game to him." Because he has
principally known only success in the theater, he is, Hancock believes,
"flabbergasted" by bad reviews or empty houses. She remembers touring with
the National in the States in the mid-eighties and, after "tumultuous
success" in other cities, arriving to "terrible indifference" in Chicago. "He took it personally that people weren't queuing round the block to see
him. . . . And Ian went into overdrive, and he was on every radio show, and
appearing in every newspaper. And of course in a week it was packed."

He applies the same conscientiousness, and gargantuan energy, to
acting itself — methodically shifting between companies and directors, between
grand and intimate performances. Directors say he will try absolutely
anything in rehearsal and dissect text with the tireless-ness of a semiotician, "picking away," as Richard Eyre says, "at the tiny moment." This assiduity has resulted in some of the most freshly conceived,
revelatory performances in recent British theater: a glamorous,
incandescently power-drunk Macbeth
for director Trevor Nunn in 1975; the convention-shedding gay Dachau inmate
in Martin Sherman's harrowing Bent
(in which he first appeared nearly a decade before coming out); and, in
1988, in Nunn's Othello, a
bracingly military Iago, who plies his mechanical soldier's mind to wreak
peacetime havoc. His current Richard III is presented as another out-of-work
military man, but on a grander iconographic scale. Moving through a stylized
world staged to suggest England in the thirties, this Richard — his defect
minimized to a withered left arm and a concealed hump, and with a
ruling-class lockjaw accent — is elegantly carved in ice with sly, shocking
glimmers of psychopathic anger and contempt, unlike the more showily
grotesque Richards of yore. Suggesting such period fascistic figures as
Oswald Mosley and Edward VIII, he is a political master of hypocrisy. Playing him, says McKellen, was "unnervingly easy."

In interviews from the early eighties on, McKellen began to hint at a
basic emptiness in his life, as if acting wasn't enough. He became an
increasingly voluble spokesman for causes — subsidized theater, actors'
rights. By 1987 (after his second starring stint on Broadway, in
Wild Honey, a disheartening
failure), he was tirelessly giving benefit performances of his one-man show,
Acting Shakespeare, to raise
money for the London Lighthouse, an AIDS hospice. And in January 1988, in a
radio debate on Clause 28 with the right-wing editor of the Sunday
Telegraph, Sir Peregrine Worsthome, he quietly but firmly declared his
homosexuality. "He was being very rude about homosexuals, saying why
couldn't they stay in their clubs? And I said, 'You mean like the Garrick
Club? '—a gentlemen's club of which he's a member which I wouldn't be seen
dead in. It turned out that I said I was homosexual, because he was
personally offensive. And it was a very good debating point, because it shut
him up. And having done it, I've not stopped doing it."
It was conversations with Armistead Maupin, the American novelist, and
his lover, Terry Anderson, a gay activist, during a visit to San Francisco
in September 1987 that McKellen says finally convinced him of the necessity
of coming out. (Maupin jokes that McKellen was, in the tradition of such
expatriate Englishmen as Christopher Isherwood and David Hockney, "Californicated"
into a greater sense of individual freedom.) They were discussing, McKellen
recalls, the "closetedness" of certain Hollywood stars and whether an openly
homosexual actor would be limited in "selling his sexuality." He began to
realize, as he says, "the fact that I know that a man is straight doesn't
stop me fancying him. If that was true, why should it stop a woman fancying
me even though she knew I wasn't straight?"
Pondering this, McKellen met with a casting director in Los Angeles,
where he was up for a part in a movie, and asked her if she thought he could
work in Hollywood if it was known he was gay. She answered, "Well, why not? The director's gay, and so is his wife." Here, McKellen mentions, off the
record, two very famous names. "The point is, if it is true, is that a
lesbian. And a gay man. Got married. And not, of course, to fool their
friends or themselves, but to fool the world. . . . I went right off
Hollywood."

The actual process of coming out was, McKellen says, surprisingly
painless. When he called his stepmother and sister to tell them he was gay,
they informed him they'd known that for thirty years. The public mail he has
since received has been almost entirely positive. And while he had been
counseled that his career would be damaged, it has only grown since then. The first role he accepted, "quite deliberately" and with typically
strategic finesse, was the part in the film
Scandal of John Profumo, the
government minister undone by a liaison with a call girl, and a man "whose
only distinguishing characteristic was that he was a raving heterosexual."
When McKellen returned to California — to accept an AlDS-support-group
award as Entertainment Industry Buddy of the Year — in September 1990, Maupin
found a man "much easier with himself.'' The event itself is one Maupin, who
attended with Anderson, says he will always remember. "This was a
star-studded evening. Everybody in the world was in the room — Don Johnson and
Melanie Griffith, Bette Midler, Madonna. . . . And Ian got up in front of every
major closet case in Hollywood and told them to come out of the closet. . .
that he had never felt this good. And that if anyone wanted help in coming
out, that the three of us would be standing in the corner of the lobby after
the event to give counsel. And there was a silence like you've never heard. He had said the unspeakable."

Three months later, he was awarded a knighthood. McKellen admits he
was stunned by the ensuing controversy. "I thought it was going to be a
reaction where people would say, 'How dare you give a knighthood to a poofter?' " He continues firmly, "I carry on as beforehand. I think I've got
license to do whatever I want. That was what was basically wrong with
Derek's argument. If you've got a knighthood, then you can do what you want;
you don't start shutting up when you've got it."
Indeed, McKellen continues to rail loudly against heterosexual
tyranny. "Who's telling us that we've got to stay where we are? Men, you
know. Who can only define themselves in terms of their sexual prowess. And
that's why they're frightened of gays. Because gays say, 'We are men, and we
don't fuck women.' Take away that from some mogul tycoon's image of himself
and what is he left with? In female-dominated societies, there are fewer
problems with being gay. . . . It's Papa who worries. Uncle Sam ain't too
sure of himself. And the same here, of course," he concludes, with a
delighted, deep-voiced reference to Major's female predecessor. "Because
Mrs. Thatcher is a man."
McKellen delivered this statement one afternoon in the garden cafe of
the Lighthouse, the AIDS hospice he helped raise money to establish. Like
all the places where I met him, it is linked exclusively to his public life.
His house, in the Docklands section of London (financed largely by the money
he made from Amadeus), and his private pursuits are strictly, he
says, his own. And there is a distinction, he points out, "between saying
you're gay and saying who you're sleeping with and how you sleep with them."

By most accounts, his private life has been rather austere. Sean
Mathias notes that McKellen was always "too mean on himself.. . . When I met
him, he was wearing old jumble-sale coats and driving a stupid old scooter,
which I refused to get on. He didn't have a license to drive a motorcar. So
I kind of encouraged him to take a motor test and earn some money and to buy
some nice clothes. People say that I styled him."
Mathias sees further evidence of the puritan in his former lover. "He's uncomfortable if people talk about sex in public. Whereas I love to do
the opposite. . . . But I don't know. He's the most extraordinarily private
person. Very secretive. I'm sure I prized him open a lot as well. . . . I
used to have to pin him down to talk about anything that was to do with an
emotion or life, really, before. Now I think he is more open."
Other friends describe him as a bountifully generous man — someone given
to taking friends going through hard times on holiday or writing long,
supportive letters to them — and a person who loves company and parties. But
Peter Eyre says, "Like a lot of gregarious people, he's very, very solitary.
I think he's really quite shut away in himself."
When I first spent time with McKellen, some months ago, he admitted
that the energy he had poured into his work as an actor and activist had
left no place for "the unexpected." He would like, he said, to live with
someone again "before I've forgotten how." He continued, sotto voce, "I
can't expect the pleasures of relationships to come my way. They have to be
earned. But I don't earn them at the moment."
When I mentioned this to Mathias, he answered, "I think he doesn't
spend enough time alone. I think you can be with somebody in a relationship,
or less solitary, only if you have spent a lot of time with yourself. And he
spends so much time in the theater, and so much time attending to his
activism, there can be very little time for reflection. So my advice would
be: 'Well, hang out on your own a bit more, baby.' "
This, McKellen assured me — when I met him again this March — is exactly
what he has been doing recently. Though he had arrived at the National
harried and irritable — having missed lunch to do a BBC radio broadcast
on gay issues and spent his morning writing an introduction to a book of
interviews with people with AIDS — he claimed he had rearranged his schedule
in order to have "quite enough time to myself, even to the extent
occasionally of getting bored. And I love getting bored — it's a great
challenge."

In fact, when he finishes the States tour of Richard III this
fall, he intends to take at least a year and a half off from the theater,
possibly to write a book — perhaps on Shakespeare, perhaps on coming out — and
to see if, finally, he can find satisfying work in film. He says he is
making room for "the serendipitous, the ball from left field. It's all
much, much better."
Still, my most lingering memory of him comes from almost a year
earlier. We had spent the entire day together, and as we sat down to a
hasty, starchy dinner in the National cafeteria, he had finally begun to
unwind a bit. His vast hands cradling his chin, he looked across the room at
an old man sitting by himself by a window, over a steaming mug of tea. He
was a caretaker, McKellen told me, who had been with the National for years.
"He's my favorite man here," he crooned softly. "Isn't he gorgeous?
Look at him — he's always alone."
Copyright © Condé Nast 1992.
|
|